Posts tagged ERII
Windsor Family Values
As One gets older, One finds it increasingly difficult to feign interest in what One’s subjects have to say. Fortunately, One is The Queen, and thus when One chooses to take a short nap, no one has the guts to call One out for it.
Horrid little man, that Mr. Cheney. Wouldn’t stop ogling one’s bosom.
Sir Kenneth is very talented, of course, and One is a fan, of course, but must he insist on speaking in iambic pentameter all the time? We get it, Branagh, you loouuuurve Shakespeare.
Oh hell. What do you lot want?
Hands off one’s flowers, you ruffian.
One simply finds it difficult to believe that you couldn’t have found anyone who could sing better than Russell Crowe.
One tried to explain to Dr. Inge that the flowers were intended for Oneself, but he insisted he should have them because they matched his outfit. Listen, One gets plenty of posies, and if One has learned anything from Elton John, it’s that it’s useless to argue with a man in a gown.
Lovely girl, Miss McCartney. One was kind enough to give her some styling tips and make a small adjustment to her outfit. A lady is never fully dressed without a brooch.
Dear Mr. Michaels,
As you may know, One has given young Henry permission to visit America again this spring. One would be much obliged if you would let him host your program whilst he is there, as One is quite certain he will get into less trouble hosting a live television program than he would were he left to his own devices on the streets of Manhattan. This is One’s wish and One’s command.
Your ever loving Anointed Sovereign
ERII
Philip, one has said it before and one will say it again: You look ridiculous in that hat.
Hang on tight, Phillip. One’s going to drive it like one stole it.
Camilla, one doesn’t care how much fun it is drinking with Andy Cohen; there is absolutely no way we are signing on for The Real Housewives of Windsor.
Rolling with one’s homies.
This gentleman would have one believe that this car sometimes carries so many passengers that some are forced to ride standing up. Can you imagine anything more ridiculous?
Just having one’s chauffeur drop one off at the Tube. The daily commute … ugh, right?
